Monday, 31 December 2012

The Great Escape (Flying Saucers) - TV Boy II [Atari 2600 clone]

Blind play session recorded sometime in late 2011, upscaled to HD and uploaded December 2012 for your viewing delectation. Should have been part of a 'Failed LPs' video that has not come to pass. Yet.

Sadly has nothing to do with Stevie McQueen or anything cool like that, though hamburgers are alright I suppose. Which reminds me, why do graphics in Atari games always look like food? Is that why many kids growing up in the 1980s became overweight slobs? Or perhaps that's just me?

The idea of breaking out of jail has always fascinated me, but maybe that's because I'm sat in a cell in Wormwood Scrubs. Uh oh, I hear the guards coming - leisure time is over. Back to breaking bricks for pig food and next year's mince pies, then.

Saturday, 29 December 2012

A Bog Standard Christmas (with Pages From Yack Text!) - 21.12.2012

Captured from Yack TV on 21 December, the projected end of the world.

  • [0:27] Santa's Sleigh 
  • [5:00] Save Santa 
  • [10:45] Zampabolas 

With extra tuneage by Kevin MacLeod @

Addendum: Tarantula (c)1955 Universal Studios. Damn you,, for misleading me into believing this was public domain. Fair Dealings, Fair Dealings! Meh, I suppose nobody cares.

Friday, 28 December 2012

Type-in Tacenda: A Classic Christmas

This Christmas, we're going back to the genesis (no, not the games console, or indeed that American Pro Wrestling tournament) of video games with a couple of type-in classics for the Amstrad CPC.

I can say with some certainty there is not one person watching that hasn't played either Breakout or Pong, most likely both. But have you played Bustout or Telly Tennis? If so, I pity you... :P

Bustout by Alexander Martin holds the distinction of being the first Amstrad type-in outside the system manual. Telly Tennis, meanwhile, provides a novel alternative to the classic Pong... at 0.1mph. The former holds a place in type-in history and is worth a place in this most festive of specials, but the latter? Well, I wouldn't bother.

[0:07] Bustout AKA Breakout AKA Arkanoid AKA bashing blocks
[3:07] Telly Tennis AKA Ping Pong AKA... well, Pong

Whiteboard Pong by Harold Yack

Merry Chrimbo.

Saturday, 22 December 2012

Lord of the Leg-byes - Cricket Crazy [Amstrad CPC]

Of all the subjects you could make a text adventure about, cricket is probably the least likely. Thankfully, this game has little to do with the sport, instead focusing on the continuing adventures of the England cricket team circa 1988.

Action centres around events described in Ian 'Ram' Botham's autobiography 'Guano and Gower'. You'll have to watch the video to find out what happens, because the book was pulled by the ECB after only 300 copies were printed. Apparently they don't like players blabbing about top secret operations in Natangaville, Kerguezeland.

The verdict? Favourable, as it happens. It's not too difficult to find your way around, and a very British sense of humour is prevalent to brighten the most boring of situations. Plus there's a walkthrough available on the internet just in case you get confused in all the guano-pilfering action.

Goes on ten minutes too long considering I only demo half the game, but what the heck.

I wonder what we had to pick up those tea bags for? Considering why we eventually needed the cigarettes, I'd suggest they may be to feed a hungry shark with a taste for Earl Grey.

Thursday, 20 December 2012

Type-in Tacenda: Not worth examining - Stonefear Castle [Amstrad CPC]

Remember, people: do *not* feed the trolls. Unless they are about to eat you, in which situation it is just about acceptable to offer them the rest of your Kit Kat. While he stares in wonderment at the vivid red wrapper, thick dollops of saliva dripping from his grog-blossomed chin, one can make good one's exit. That is, if you know the correct command(s).

Sadly, with these simplistic text adventure games, it is more a case of finding out what you have to do than having fun exploring what you aren't supposed to. As a result, you could very easily get stuck for days, perhaps weeks, until someone tells you you have to combine the hammer and the candle to create a bandage to fix your sword. Only *then* does it all become obvious. But then you realise you're stuck on the next part and promptly give up once more. :P

That sad part is, I haven't even got far enough into the game for the troll to kill me! Nothing I do or say affects him in any way, as if he is waiting patiently for the trigger word or action like a spy from one of Ian Fleming's Bond novels. I know it is possible to die, for I have seen the game's code thanks to that handy LIST command. I am too much of a BASIC noob, however, to decipher the correct solution from it. Boo!

Tuesday, 11 December 2012

Couch Gaming Pilot #2 - Metal Gear Solid Demo disc [Playstation 1] with Cornelius

Haha, I will use the American comic book numbering convention if I like. Take that, stuffy old English teacher! Oh, why do these videos always end in conversations about stuff that happened at school?

My very favourite video game demo of all time has to be that found with the UK copy of ISS Pro '98 for the Playstation 1, namely Metal Gear Solid. This version only incorporates the first two areas, which you can play through in about five minutes, but we used to squeeze every bit of playability out the disc and stretch it out to half an hour.

There is another, longer MGS demo, but I have yet to get my grubby little grease-coated hands on it. When I do, one can be certain I will perform yet another monologue on its delightfulness. In short, send me all your worthless Metal Gear demos! :P

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Monday, 10 December 2012

Type-in Tacenda: Smiley v. the Grumpies [Amstrad CPC]

If Centipods was the budget brand version of Centipede, then this is surely the free sample edition of Pac-Man. Roland Waddilove actually coded a few half-decent BASIC games in the mid-80s, but I really don't think this is one of them.

The main problem here is that it is not entirely clear how, or if you even can, defeat the enemy faces (henceforth referred to as 'ghosts' for obvious reasons). Without a method to effectively extinguish them, it is rather hard to evade the clutches (mouth?) of three frowny faces with simple yet deadly BASIC AI.

Weirdly, in a test recording for this, I did actually manage to defeat two of the three ghosts so either it *is* possible or I glitched out the game. I have not invested a second's worth of play in the game since I made this video so I am unable to confirm or deny this with any certainty.


Want a good Pac-Man game for the Amstrad? Well, you can't get much better than Pac-Man itself, I guess.

Sunday, 9 December 2012

Type-in Tacenda: The Centipod Shuffle [Amstrad CPC]

Ever wonder where Apple get names for new products? That's right, they play old type-in games from 80s computing magazines.

Welcome to the Amstrad's budget brand version of Centipede. It's never going to be as good as the original, but is pretty decent as far as typed-in games go. It seems there is no story, so here is my own attempt, complete with obligatory iffy Google Translation:
"Gary the Garden Gnome was out for evening stroll in forest, when suddenly bright light came and was blind. The aliens arrived! They take the form of cuboid boxes of cardboard and advance upon Gary like centipede. 
"As sole survivor of gnome race, you must throw stones at monster to turn them to trees. When all body parts are removed, Gary must survive the next wave of alien and prevent takeover. 
"Can you save the universe from Centipod? Have fun!"

If you're the slightest bit interested (and after that story, you *should* be), you can find this game on the ultra-rare(?) 64 Typed In Programs compilation tape/disk.

It's also on this compilation, apparently.

Author: Aramello Chapman

Monday, 3 December 2012

Couch Gaming Pilot #1: Gran Turismo 3 [Playstation 2] with Gomez

A couple of months ago, I reached a point where I had to change the way I make these game videos. It was taking far longer to edit than actually make them, to the point where it was becoming less fun and even, to some extent, affecting video quality. Couch Gaming is a direct reaction to this, and features a far more off-the-cuff, raw style that is hopefully just as, if not more entertaining.

Excuse the visual quality of this first episode, but the second edition (already recorded!) will be markedly better. As for after that, I'm hoping to switch from cam-shot to DVD-captured or something. It is difficult to be sure at this point, for the series will no doubt evolve in the coming weeks and months. Whatever happens, it is sure to be an adventure.

This first pilot features myself and Mr Gomez T Rodriguez (real name?) wittering on about the internet, apocryphal tales, Wacky Races, keyrings, and pretty much anything but Gran Turismo 3. Hence, it is mildly interesting, as opposed to Quite Interesting.

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

The Couch Gaming pilots are exclusive to 8 Bit Anarchy, surely the greatest YouTube community gaming channel there ever was.